Monitor your body image: Record triggers, thoughts, and behaviors

Your mirror is your friend

Even after reading Chapter Seven, you might still be skeptical about the claim that you can like your body without losing weight. If you have doubts, you don't have to accept my assurance. After all, I've never seen your body, while you are intimately familiar with it. Therefore, you can retain your doubts, as long as you actively and diligently complete the exercises suggested in this chapter. Remember, disliking your body is detrimental to yourself. You can like your body without hindering your weight loss efforts.

To learn to love your body, you need to first identify the specific negative thoughts you have about it. I'm sure the "I'm too fat" judgment in your mind will be different from others', but what are other people's thoughts? What exactly is your contempt for your body? For example, Toni, the 48-year-old woman mentioned in the previous chapter who married the lawyer and cyclist Bill, was convinced that anyone driving by would involuntarily focus their gaze on her buttocks with disgust because it was bigger than a bicycle seat.

For Toni, this idea was a presumption of fact. Even though she had never seen herself riding a bicycle, never verified how many drivers actually stared at her as they passed by, and never questioned whether other people's perception of her disgust was accurate. Anne, the teacher who avoided the full-length mirror, was particularly embarrassed by her belly. Besides sucking it in when she saw people, she didn't want to date because she was certain that anyone who might become her sexual partner would be disgusted by her round belly.

Monitor your body image

Record your thoughts about your body. Create a body imagery chart using your notebook or 3x5 cardstock, and carry it with you at all times. The chart should include three columns:

Trigger perceptions and feelings behavior

A trigger is any stimulus that makes you think about your body. It could be looking in a mirror, seeing an old dress hanging in your closet, hearing people talk about dieting, or anything else that makes you notice your body. The second column should contain your thoughts about your body, such as "I'm too fat," "I'll never fit into that dress," or "They'll be disgusted by my thighs." Also, record the feelings that accompany these thoughts, which typically include sadness, anxiety, guilt, or embarrassment.

In the "Behavior" column, if applicable, write down your reaction to the thoughts and feelings. It might be avoiding the mirror, sucking in your stomach, or changing your clothes. Behaviors could also be things you intended to do but didn't. For example, if you wanted to go swimming but decided not to because you thought "I look too fat in my swimsuit," write that in the third column.

Carefully consider how you write in the "Behaviors" column. Some activities may have been avoided for so long that you no longer consider doing them. For example, you might think you're too fat to play softball, so you haven't even considered joining your workplace softball team. Even if you haven't thought about it, it should still be recorded in the third column, because avoidance is a result of your body image. The table below illustrates what Tony wrote when Bill invited her to ride a bike with him:

Trigger: Bill wanted me to ride a bicycle

My thoughts and feelings: People will be disgusted with me, and I will feel embarrassed.

Behavior: Finding an excuse not to go

Recording the second column initially can be difficult because many thoughts and feelings arise spontaneously without your awareness. To more easily identify spontaneous thoughts, find events you know that cause particular discomfort with your body. List in your notebook frequently occurring events that easily trigger negative thoughts and feelings about your body, including the location, people involved, and activities.

Once you've identified the four types of events, the next time you find yourself in a situation where these events occur, be sure to use your body imagery log to record the thoughts, feelings, and actions that arise. For example, if you have negative thoughts while walking past a full-length mirror in your apartment building lobby, write them down along with your actions. These events you've identified are just a starting point. Once you begin monitoring your body imagery-related thoughts, you'll become aware of other events that trigger them. Don't try to change anything this week; the purpose of this exercise is simply to make you aware of the body imagery-related thoughts and feelings you experience.

Trigger

After a week of monitoring your body imagery, review your body image log to identify the types of thoughts you've had. First, look at the first column and see if there are any other people, places, or events that trigger your body imagery thoughts besides the four types already identified. You might be surprised to find that seeing a certain friend makes you more focused on your body than seeing other friends, or that walking past a gym on your way to work triggers these thoughts. List any other triggers you discover after a week of monitoring in your notebook.

Opinions and feelings

There are several common types of perceptions and feelings related to body image. The first is psychological filtering. If you look at yourself in the mirror, does your attention immediately focus on a body part that you find unsatisfactory instead of looking at the whole body? For example, do you immediately focus on your stomach and ignore your face, clothes, and the rest of your body? The second common type is labeling or using emotionally charged words such as ugly, disgusting, or repulsive when you think of body parts you don't like.

If you don't use these derogatory terms, do you use self-deprecating humor like "thunderous thighs," "bubble butt," "beer belly," or "love handles" (referring to a ring of fat around the stomach)? Whether you use negative words or humorous terms, thinking about your body this way can make you feel sad, guilty, or resentful towards yourself, thereby undermining your self-confidence. A third common type of thinking is jumping to conclusions or making future predictions based on self-evaluation of your body. For example, after thinking your body is disgusting, you might conclude that no one would want to marry you, or that you'll never get a promotion at work because everyone dislikes your appearance. These predictions lead to further frustration and a further drop in self-esteem.

Write down your thoughts about body imagery that have arisen over the past week in your notebook. Beyond psychological filtering, negative labeling, and leaps in conclusion, you may discover other types of perceptions you have of your body.